Roadrunner Fin

Just a quick heads up, I ended things with RR. More details later. Mothers,lock up your daughters.

Girl Picture Reference: Roadrunner

For your viewing convenience, I will try to post some pics of celebs that the girls commonly referenced here sort of resemble.

Roadrunner = Vanessa Hudgens + Lilo

Feeling kind of shitty

I'm organizing my co-workers I've decided. I just want some sort of severance plan or at least a two week notice built in to our contracts so that people aren't left stranded.

I want to get out of this place. Fucking Leslie. Fuck that guy, too. I can't remember his name.

None of my friends like RR. Or at least, none of my friends who have an opinion that I listen to like her. But fuck that, too, because she's fun to hang out with, even if she IS sort of ditzy and dumb and stuff. Maybe they don't believe me when I tell them that I hate sleeping alone or even being in my bed by myself (RR doesn't spend the night, so that still exists). My bed is cold.

It'd be nice if ANYthing were what it ought to be.

Oops

Have you ever meant to text something to Person 2 regarding Person 1 that may have been sort of embarrassing or totally out of line, but you accidentally texted it to Person 1? Yeah, my bad.

W T F and O M G

Let's start with OMG for Leslie:

From the Betty Beauty Bridal Division: http://www.bettybeauty.com/bridal.php
I think that blue is a beautiful color on you.

And now for the WTF:

This morning I woke up with a text from Roadrunner that said
"I was wondering whose number this is would you please text me back?"
So I texted and said
"This is Nathan, did I text you by accident?"
And she responds with
"oh good no you didnt. I needed to tell you something. I miss you and i have not been able to stop thinking about you since we broke up"

Blah blah blah, long story short, we're going out the weekend after this coming one. I'm not really planning anything either way. I'm just sort of curious to see what happens. Updates to come.

Los Updatos

Okay, real quick:

Told SL what was up, she says that we cannot hang out anymore.
RR texted me today to wish me luck on my first day (at the new job...tomorrow).

Just wanted to make sure I understod.

कॉफी रेफिल्ल्स

Okay, so do you remember my telling you about the cutest girl ever who worked at Bunna? Well, I'm renaming her (she used to be tagged on here as Coffee, but I recently misused that tag to reference the actual drink, so the change is necessary). I'm going to call her Buster, in reference to Buster from Arrested Development who studied Cartography. This makes sense because she is taking a cartography class right now. Amazing. She is a geography major. In love.

Okay, sooooo, I hadn't seen her in a long time (more or less since I had moved to Tempe from Gilbert, as she had suggested I might like this new coffee shop called Cartel Coffee Lab). What I mean is that I used to go to Bunna, then I stopped because I found that Cartel is amazing. I would still every so often go to Bunna just to flirt with Buster, but she was never there.

About a month ago maybe I was at Cartel and she walked in. Heart stops. She's STILL the cutest girl ever, in case you were wondering. She actually recognized and remembered me, which was fun for me. We spoke for a second and my flaming desire to be engulfed in her fiery embrace was once again doused with the most flammable of combusting liquids. I mean to say that my crush was uncrumpled and recrushed. I liked her again, in other words. However, at that time, things with Roadrunner were just starting to get interesting, so I wrote it off to chance for a second.

She came in again a week or two later and the same thing happened and I decided that if things with Roadrunner didn't work out, she'd be my next big interest.

Fast forward to yesterday.

My car broke down on the way to Sedona/Flagstaff. I had to come back. I didn't tell anyone this, but I felt like there was something that I needed to be here for and that's why maybe my car didn't let me get to Oak Creek. I mean, camping would have been fun, but I would have missed something while I was gone.

Fast forward to today.

I'm sitting in Cartel drawing in my sketchbook. I've been there for a few hours at this point, having no where else to be and not a car to get there in. I look up when the door opens and a vaguely familiar silhouette moves into the room. As she moves closer, the lights wrap around her and reveal her face, complete with new haircut. She walks over and says hi. I compliment her new style. She smiles and asks if she can see what I'm drawing. I hand her the stack of my already finished drawings, since those were better than the one I was working on. I admit that "these are less embarrassing." We talk, and then someone opens the door so I suggest that she get in line, lest she be waiting there forever. I say that I'll stand with her, and she agrees. She orders. She gets her drink. We talk about where she lives. She says that she lives on Mitchell. I mention that that is the same street that Mucho Gusto is on. She says that she has never been there. I say that it is tasty, but expensive. I relay story of Adam almost ordering a $15 bean and no cheese burrito. We laugh. She says that her friends all tell her that she'd like it, but she has just never gone. I say, "Would you like to go with me?" or something like that. She says sure. I pat my pockets adorably and say, "...the one time in my life that I don't have a pen on me...let me get your number." I offer one of my colored markers and the first page of my sketchbook. She doesn't want to draw on one of my drawings. I tell her it's okay, the page is just a protective page for the next page which has an actual drawing on it. She says okay and writes her cutest number in the world. She has a foreign area code. We talk about where she's from. She goes to class.

WEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD

So RR and I broke up. I will now commence dating many random Cartel girls. Discuss.

What a world or something

Things with RR were oddly casual. There was no reciprocity. She was down on me all the time, but was reticent to receive. Then there was the offer of sex. Too far too fast.

Secret Lover and Savra broke up and Savra moved out. That night, SL came over for dinner and movies. Royal Tenenbaums. When Harry Met Sally. She slept here. I may have had the chance to kiss her. In fact, I have no doubt. But I felt guilty. On the one hand, I was with RR, even though that was rocky and weird. On the other, even if SL and I are to be together, it can't be for a long long time. Like months. Many months. So I didn't want to confuse things this early. I don't want her to feel tied down, because I don't want to be tied down myself.

The next night things with RR got better. It was unexpected. We conciled (the re seems unnecessary). I felt much more connected to her all of a sudden. I am with her.

Now things with SL are weird. Hmm. Game night.

Weirdest. End. Of. Night. Ever.

After the 2ND blowie, she says, "Do you have any condoms?"

Of course, at this point I laugh and say, "We're not having sex"

What the fuck? I feel a certain pang of regret and guilt immediately after saying this.

Me: "You just blew me TWICE, I'm not having any sex"
RR: "You don't think you could get it up for just a minute?"
Me: *stunned silence* "Is this really how you want to lose it?"
RR: "No...you could just put it in once, I just want to know what it feels like"
Me: "No, we're not doing it"

She then proceeded to get dressed again and tried to leave sort of fast-ish. I had to slow her down just so that I could walk her out.

There were a few things that I left out. I mean, right before she went down the second time, I had my hand in a particularly tender place on her body, OVER her jeans. She mentioned maybe doing her (oral, I guess?) tonight, but rehashed the whole worried about how she'll compare with my exes thing. She also was worried about me thinking she was gross etc etc, and whatever. So I said, "maybe we should just wait until you're all groomed and showered and whatever" which she responded to with, "but I want it," which was promptly followed with more hee-hawin and anxiety. Then she went down on me before letting me know whether or not she was gonna have a go. THEN we had the above conversation.

What.
The.
Fuck...?

This girl is weird as hell.

Oh, but dinner was amazing. I'm great at cooking some stuff.

So here's the deal

Was drunk and with phone, so hilarity and destiny ensued.

Roadrunner got some lame dirty texting, which she thought was fun, so no problems. People and their guilt. Makes no sense. Just enjoy your life for a second or two. It's okay, Jesus won't damn you. Or maybe he will, in which case I apologize. My bad.

Secret Lover got the table and all that's on it, which is now everything.

Peace Corps application is officially submitted. Now I shiver with anxious energy for the entire next year, wondering if I'm man enough to do this. Expect a whole new slew of "will she wait?" songs based on SL probably, but don't tell RR that they aren't about her. It's casual, and it's okay that way. We're both invested. We're Jim and Karen, but Pam is still answering phones. Does that make sense? Yes, it does.

The new job starts on the 15th (a Monday). I will do a week or two of training here in Tempe, then may have to relocate to a battleground state until the end of the election. I'm super excited about this.

Leslie is going backpacking forever. I really want to do this, too. I was thinking that maybe when I get back from Peace Corps, if I still don't want to rejoin civilization, I could take the money they give me and go backpacking through Europe or something. I mean, I could also invest the money wisely, but that sucks and doesn't do anything except yield more money. Money is for fools. Or am I going to do that Masters program thing? I forget. Oh well.

Oooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh shit

I think that I've figured it out.

I'm with Roadrunner currently. I mean, not right NOW, but in general.

Secret Lover is breaking up with Savra. We hung out last night and, um, for lack of a better word, cuddled. We drank a bottle of wine. Nothing else happened.

When Secret Lover breaks up with her boy, I will abstain. Demand she have time on her own. I will continue to casually date Roadrunner.

There is too much history with Secret Lover. We can't just date. It's like Jim and Pam. We ARE them. Ha, called it.

Roadrunner OMG

Okay, so she deserves an entire long update, but I just don't have time right now. All I time for right now is to say enough to make Adam pee his pants with giddy joy.

Apparently, as some point, the phrase "I'm sorry, but we have to slow down" started to mean, "I want to do things to you on a country club golf course at night"

I ain't saying something happened. I ain't saying something DIDN'T happen. All I'm saying is that those two phrases, in my universe, now mean the same thing.

Tonight

I'm playing tonight at 8pm.
Here's the setlist

Dm Instrumental Thing
Dirt & Water Salvation
Linoleum Floors
Oh, Leslie (By Adam)
Two Years From Now
Roadrunner (Give Her To Me)
I Wish That I Could See You Soon (By Herman Dune)

I wonder how long that'll be?

Roadrunner V: Well, THAT was unexpected

I called Roadrunner at about 2:30 to ask how her finals are going. She was done, and did well, by the way. But that's besides the point.
I'd spent the whole day deciding that date idea numero uno would be for her to come over and watch some Planet Earth, and I would make us dinner. I also decided that I should have some backup ideas, in case she was uncomfortable coming to my house. I mean, maybe I'm overthinking the whole situation or overestimating her conservatism or something, but I was worried that she would hear that connection between my HOUSE, and the third date and think that I was just trying to get in her pants. Blah blah, the point is that I didn't want her to feel uncomfortable, so I spent the day at work gathering backup date ideas. Got some excellent places:

-Kazimierz (www.kazbar.net) which is a super rad wine bar in Scottsdale.
-The Orange Table, which is apparently some sort of breakfast and lunch kind of place in Old Town.
-SMoCA, or the Scottsdale Museum of Contemporary Art, which also butts rights up to a lake thing that has eating and wine and such.
-Challenger Space Something or Other, place in Peoria that has stargazings and related space things.
-Something else that I forgot.

Well, anyways, I called her and threw out the idea about me making us dinner and all that, and she was down, so I was obviously worried about nothing.

I head off to get supplied.

Whole Foods:
Bell Peppers (Red, Orange, Yellow)
Onion (Yellow)
Rainier Cherries
Black Grapes
Salad
Blueberry Dressing
Kiltlifter 6pk
Fat Tire 6pk
Demi Baguette (tiny french bread)
Raw Vegan Cheesecake
Stravecchio (sort of like Parmeggiano)
Angel Hair Pasta
Basil and Zucchini Pasta Sauce
Bottled Water

Target:
New pillows (my old ones are getting lumpy and lame)
Lighters
Tumblers

Alltel Store:
Getting a new phone sent to me

So I got home and immediately set to cleaning the house, duh. I managed the hide most of the really bad shit from the living room, and did a decent job in the kitchen, since that's where we'd be. Took out the trash. Hid my clothes and stuff in my room.

She rolled up while I was still in the shower, so Louis let her in. I finished up and got smelling good and all that then set to do dinner.

Here's what I made:

"Sauteed" half of each bell pepper with about 1/3 of the onion and two sliced garlic cloves. I warmed two cans of diced tomatoes, and added the vegetables to it to sort of simmer. We had that sauce over the pasta, and I also skillet toasted demi baguette slices with stravecchio shavings and some italian seasoning. I forgot about the salad, and neither of us really wanted beer. Anyways, it was great, and she loved it.

We had some issues with Planet Earth, trying to find that sweet shark footage, which was on some nonsense disc. Anyways, after that was all over we started making out on the couch, which is not really built for making out it would seem, so I asked if she wanted to move off the couch. We walked back to my room and resumed where we'd left off. Things got a little heated, which is why I titled this entry how I did. You don't know what I'm about to tell you, but somehow I ended up having my hand all up in between her thighs. I will also mention that ALL clothes are still on, which is a little awkward and made it hard to, um, finish the job, but that's a whole nother story. Anyways, considering what was occurring I moved to gain easier manual access (undo her jeans), and she stopped me. Now, that's fine, I mean this all sort of came out of nowhere, so I totally expected her to stop me, but what I didn't expect was what she SAID. She stops me for a second, then looks at me, and goes, "I have a penis." LOL, nah, I'm just kidding, she said, "I'm sorry, I've never done this before" So that was kind of trippy (considering how gorgeous she is), and I just did my best to assure her that it's totally cool, and that we move at whatever speed she's comfortable with. Anyways, we ended up back there again (overpants), but everytime I ventured anywhere near underneath of clothing she totally stopped me, haha. So yeah, totally unexpected.

We made out for a long while, and then just laid there and almost fell asleep, so we got up and she left. She's going to Michigan on Saturday morning, and won't be back for like a week, so there will be no news regarding her for a while.

Anyways, if anything ever happens with Roadrunner, NEVER tell her that I just told you what went down. The point of this entry is that this girl is super sweet and seems sort of conservative, but I think that she is mostly just unexperienced (she kisses kind of awkwardly to be frank). Lesson learned: everyone's horny, and that includes you.

Roadrunner on the way

This Thursday I plan to take RR out again. Or I should say, I plan going out with her again. I called her on like Saturday and she said that she'd like to go out again. Thursdays seem to be the day for now, just because of her schedule. No biggie, it just means that I'll have to wake up early the next day to go to San Francisco. She mentioned that she needed to be home sort of early on Thursday anyway (pick up a friend from the airport), so it works out. Anywho, the plan is looking like Botanical Gardens, as she has never been, and would like to go. Then probably some dinner. I was sort of thinking The Breadfruit for dinner. Like half of their menu is vegan. Tight.

Anywho, I'm going to shower and go to work now.

Roadrunner Redux

So I don't really much feel like explaining the whole sitch, but Roadrunner has made a comeback. We went hiking, blah blah, now we're going out tonight. Here's the plan:

Pick her up at 7:30
Go eat at Malee's on Main in Scottsdale
Maybe drive around or hang out or something
Goodnight
Good Morning?

What is it about you?

I was just admiring a girl in class that I would have to admit is not good looking. At least not according to what most people (Ashlee) would consider good looking. Ashlee would meet this poor soul, laugh, and then say "Nathan, no, she is not cute. She is not pretty at all. She is, in fact, ugly." However, something about this girl allures me. She is very pale, and has bad skin. She isn't overweight, but she isn't particularly toned or anything. She has beautiful red hair that she wears in a not-very-flattering way, and kind of dorky (but not dorky-chic) glasses. So I don't know what it is. I know that I like the way that her hair color juxtaposes itself against her very light skin. It is like ketchup on mayonnaise. Or menstrual blood on cotton panties. Basically red on white. I don't know why, but I like it. I've never heard her voice, as she is very quiet and remains so in class. She seems shy. She is not a fashion-plate. She wore today a pair of jeans, flip flops, and a super bowl shirt. I'm not sure what it is.

There is a girl in THIS class, one who I actually awkwardly found on match.com. She is very skinny. She has a very long neck, and a sort of peculiar face. Blond hair. Tan skin. Not slutty. Very fashionable in the colder winter, but it's harder to do so when it gets so warm. She still dresses well though. She is very inviting, and I know that she has to have also seen me online in all of my shame. I wonder if she wonders why I never asked her out after finding out that she is alone and looking. I hope not. I think that that would be awkward and untoward of me. I pretend always that I am going to ask her out.

A girl in the same class as Ketchup and Mayonnaise has lupus. She is generally very well dressed, and has a fantastic haircut. She is sort of goofy looking, but in a way that I find attractive, apparently. I think that Ashlee would say that she is plain. Fuck it.

Roadrunner, by the way, is a funny opposite example. Her ass sort of reminds me of a 40 year old woman's ass. Which is to say that it isn't particularly sexy. I mean, I'm sure it's nice unclothed. Maybe she just doesn't know how to buy jeans that work with her curve. I can show her the way.

Whatever, I'm just killing time in class now. I have an interesting class coming up, and then we are going to dinner for class as well at this place called C-Fu. Our teacher has been freaking out about dim sum lately, so he wanted to have class there. Apparently, dim sum is like tapas, only chinese, and served with tea instead of booze.

Ugh, I can't wait for this semester to be over. I just want to spend the summer working out and making some money. I am pretty excited about starting entirely anew. A new house, a new lifestyle, a new job. Good stuff.

I made a new myspace, but really only for work related stuff. I don't intend to use it for personal crap at all.

I want to get another pair of glasses. It occurred to me that it is weird for us to expect everyone to only wear the same pair all the time. I mean, I don't always do my hair the same way, and I certainly don't wear the same shirt everyday, so why shouldn't I have some choices for these things? They are one of the most immediate and memorable aspects of my appearance. Let's shake it up.

I'm getting a cd player in the car, finally. I'm just going to go get it done by Best Buy or something, and my parents are paying me back as a (late) birthday gift. It's going to be good. I also need some new floor mats, and maybe some seat covers. We'll see.

Bored.

Roadrunner III

She texts me on Thursday:

Her: "Do you have to work tomorrow? Oh this is ::roadrunner:: by the way"
Me: I think that I deleted this message, but I said something about not being sure that my mom's car would make it on Saturday (I obviously didn't read that her message was asking about Friday)
Her: "Well I was going to see if you wanted to run with me on Friday instead"
Me: "You're killing me, lol, i have to work on friday. Unless you run at night?"
Her: "Ha ha sure how late?"
Me: "Well, i will get out of work probably around 3 or 3:30 and then i might take a nap, lol. 5 or 6 too late?"
Her: "How about 5. Is that okay?"
Me: "Yeah, I'll shoot for that. How far are we running? I hope you're okay with running like really slow, lol."
Her: "oh please i don't care how fast we run it won't bother me at all. We can go 3 or 5 or 9. You pick"
Me: "Five sounds about right."
Her: "Okie dokie sounds good. I am so excited! Oh do you want to run out here or by your house?"
Me: "Your area. There isn't much good running around here. Or i'm just bored with it, who knows?"
Her: "Okay can i call and give you directions tomorrow?"
Me: "Yeah, totally. Anyways, i have to wake up to open the shop, so i'm off to bed now. Sleep well."
Her: "Whoops sorry see ya tom."

And so then Friday I wake up and get to work, blah blah, fine. I get off at like noon ish, and then at 2 I have to go to this lame coffee class thing that lasts until about 3 or 3:20. After that Duffy, Scary Eye, and I go to Hottie to look at the clothes. They mostly suck, but they had a few things that weren't too bad. Anyways, I leave, get home, eat, turn right back around and head out to meet Roadrunner. By the time I get there, I'm about ready to piss my pants. I don't know WHY, I just really needed to pee. We actually met in the parking lot of a church a few miles from her place, and ran in that neighborhood, so I just slipped into the church and used their bathroom.

We head out and I can tell immediately that it's going to be an embarrassing night for me. I've only run like once since the half, and I can feel that my legs are just not there for me. We get about a mile and I stop to retie my shoes (my new pair). After that, there is a pretty harsh hill that I end up having to walk the second half of. She does this hill routinely, but she never complains about the pace, even when we start walking. I keep up the interest by pointing out various plants on the side of the street and mentioning their medicinal possibilities when applicable. Everything is actually going pretty well at this point, even though I'm totally holding her back. We get to a certain point, and she says,

"If we go left, it'll be 5 miles total. If we go right, it'll be 3. What do you want to do?"

Now, I hesitate to voice my real choice (3, duh), because I don't want to appear to be such a damn baby. But at the same time, I'll probably look even more stupid if I try to do 5 and end up hurting hard. So I end up standing there for a minute, deliberating. She chimes in,

"I honestly don't care if you want to just do 3. That's fine with me."

"Alright, then let's just do 3."

So we turn right and start running downhill. We run fairly solid for the rest of the time back, making only one short walk break. Now here's the analysis.

She is super super nice. Incredibly encouraging. The mother in movies that died during the main character's childhood but remains a solid memory and vision of support. At the end of the hill, she is all "Good job! You did great!" And when we finished, it was more of the same. It's nice being around someone so pleasant. It's like being hugged, sort of. Warm and fuzzy. Care bears. Rainbows. Gay things. Smiles.

She is sort of out of touch with her generation. When I asked her what she usually listens to on her ipod when she runs, she said "Oh, uh, Journey. Ya know, like Hootie and the Blowfish...." and when I asked if there was anything from within the past 10 years, she couldn't think of anything other than Jack Johnson, "who you can't really run to."

She dressed like how my mom would probably dress if she were going out to run. That was sort of endearing, though. We laughed about fashion, and about our lack of it over the years (wearing sweat pants to class, for example). She has an amazing smile framed by dimples like a gold-leaf filigree frame around some John Currin painting. She had braces once. She wants to be a dental hygienist. She has such fantastic teeth.

Anyways, I'm going to see what I can do about seeing more of her. I texted her something about like "I had fun, giggle giggle, we should do it again, teehee," or something. I'll update as necessary.



Ann-Charlotte by John Currin, 1996

Roadrunner II

I've spoken with her a few more times. I usually stop her after class and talk to her for a few minutes. She called me on Friday to ask if I wanted to go hiking with her and some other people on Saturday. I told her that I had to work so that I would not be able to go. She sounded abnormally distraught about this, which was actually sort of weird, and she asked about the next Saturday. I wasn't on the schedule for the next Saturday, so she suggested I go on a long run with her. That would have been fine, except that she wasn't kidding about the long part. She wanted to do 9 miles. Not impossible or anything, just something that I wasn't excited to do yet. She mentioned that maybe we could hike instead, which sounded way better to me.

Anyways, so then I stopped her after class yesterday and gave her a brochure for the Skirtchaser 5k (http://www.skirtchaser5k.com/) and talked to her a little about Saturday. I, for some reason or another, suggested that we run Peralta Trail, which is a decent 6.5 mile hike. She sounded sort of scared, but maybe up to it. Whatever though, it's all good. I really cannot get a good read on this girl. I think that she might just be really nice, but it'd be pretty dope if she wanted to go out. I think that I'm going to see how Saturday goes, and then maybe ask her out after that.

“She laughs at everything you say. Why? Because she has fine teeth.”

-Benjamin Franklin